yesterday.

yesterday, i didn't post simply because i was too tired, and my feet hurt and i just wanted to not be sat infront of harsh lighting after spending all day under it. i'm in work pretty much all week this week. monday i wasn't, because i was already busy, but i was in for 3 hours on tuesday - which, yes, isn't that bad, but it was a long three hours - yesterday i was in for seven and a half, today i was in for four, and will be in for four hours tomorrow.
most of the time, i can deal with work. i know it's only one day a week and that it won't be forever, but then when i'm in for more than my normal hours, something clicks in me and reminds me that i have no clue what i want to do with my life and what if this is it, what if this is my one and only job forever and i have to do it until i die and i can't cope anymore and blah.
yep, that was my head last night and i just couldn't muster up anything to talk about on therosyfreckle. and i never want this blog to be a chore, something i feel like i have to do. sure, i'd love to be able to say 'i blogged every weekday of 2013' but in all honesty, it's not going to happen. my life isn't that exciting and i can't just pull posts up from out of the blue. (the end of that sentence was rephrased before printing).
so instead, i got home, had my tea, ran a bath, drank some hot tea and read oh comely (for the first time, it's fabulous. and it was only like £4!) before i read some bible verses and went to sleep.
this morning i also plucked up the courage to take my cv into a cafe, it was scary and nerve wraking, but i did it and i'm proud of myself.
tomorrow is going to be a whole boat load of new events; i'm going to be having my first piano lesson in a decade (which makes me feel so old, ugh) and i'm going to an event at the church i've being going to (which i have been loving, and i've been forcing myself to go to all the events and get myself involved and not let myself be the shy person in the corner that never speaks to anyone, yep).

i hope you're all having a fabulous week. the snow has pretty much all melted where i live, boo, but i'm getting excited for summer and freckles and warm fingers and toes.